Last Updated on March 12, 2023 by Erin
Are you wondering how to deal with a midlife crisis? You’re not alone! Midlife crisis is a common phenomenon that many people experience during their late 30s, 40s, or 50s.
It is a period of reflection, self-doubt, and uncertainty about the future. You may feel dissatisfied with life and start questioning the choices you’ve made. It is a challenging time, but it is possible to navigate through it and emerge stronger and happier on the other side. So, let’s explore how to deal with a midlife crisis, shall we?
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Recognize the Signs of a Midlife Crisis
It is important to acknowledge these signs and then accept that they are a natural part of midlife. The signs include, but are not limited to-
- feeling bored at work
- feeling unfilled by your career
- restlessness
- anxiety
- apathy towards activities you used to enjoy
- feeling stuck
- questioning your identity and values
- uncertainty about your purpose in life
- thinking about mortality and the passage of time
- dressing and acting differently
These “signs” may lead you to feel the intense need to make a change in your life.
Related post: Midlife Crisis for Women
I started to recognize these sounds around age 35, so it was a fairly early “midlife crisis” for me. This is just my theory, but I would guess that many millennials like me, experienced some midlife pains early due to the effects of the pandemic. Let’s be honest, that was a crisis in itself for most people.
Over the last few years, the burnout with my job became so intense I finally had to recognize a change was needed. Next year, I’m transitioning from a full-time working mom to a part-time working mom.
How to Deal with a Midlife Crisis
1. Self-Evaluate
Ok, so you’ve recognized some signs of a midlife crisis. Now it’s time to take a good hard look at things. Self-reflection and introspection are important when considering the possibility of a midlife crisis because they can help you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your motivations.
You can gain insight into why you may be feeling restless, unfulfilled, or uncertain about your future. Maybe you’ll uncover some negative patterns that have been holding you back. Have you been putting everyone else’s needs first? Have you been avoiding risks because of a fear of failure?
This process might be uncomfortable but by taking the time to reflect on your life and your motivations, you can gain the clarity you need to move forward. This is your chance to turn a midlife crisis into a positive transformation towards the life you want.
The 4 big areas to evaluate are: career, relationships, health, and finances.
Career
Are you happy with your job? What could you change at work that would make it better? If there are too many things outside of your circle of control, maybe it’s time to try something new. I have a whole post with tips for making a successful midlife career change. I’m right there in the trenches with you!
Another question I had to ask myself was, is my job fulfilling? Is it meaningful and making a difference? If you’re anything like me, you are questioning the lasting impact you will have on this world. If your job feels like a waste of time…get out and find something new!
If you are truly considering a midlife career change, I’ve put together a FREE self-assessment workbook. Complete a skills inventory, values inventory, interest assessment, and feedback interviews. It can give you some great insight into what you’re looking for in a career.
Relationships
Relationships are another area to examine. Are they healthy and supportive?
Communication
OR…are you and your significant other having difficulty communicating with each other? Do you feel like you are able to communicate your needs and desires? If not, you probably feel very alone and trapped. Communication may seem like a minor issue, but it can lead to bigger problems down the road.
If you are having trouble communicating with your significant other, you might want to seek out the help of a relationship counselor. Just because you’re having relationship issues in midlife doesn’t automatically mean you’re headed for infidelity or divorce.
Different Goals
Maybe you and your partner have different life goals as you’re transitioning into midlife. That’s very common! Are you aware of your life goals and your partners? Maybe it’s time to write them down and compare. I wasn’t entirely sure of my goals until I took the time to create a vision board. It’s ok to have different goals but maybe you need to do a better job supporting each other’s goals and dreams.
Hormones
Hormones can lead to changes in desire. It’s not fun to talk about but it’s reality. Reach out to your doctor and see if they have any suggestions. Sometimes a little self-care and fun reading (*wink wink*) can do wonders.
Empty Nest
My children are still pretty young…any other midlife moms with little ones out there? BUT I know many other midlife women are experiencing empty nest syndrome. Talk about a huge shift in the family dynamic! You might feel a little disconnected with your spouse once the kids are gone.
Before I move on to the next points, I should also mention that if you have been stuck in a very unfulfilling or even abusive relationship, get out. Only work on relationships worth saving. You matter.
Health
This is a bit of a bummer and it’s been a difficult one for me to accept. Sometimes a midlife crisis can be caused or exacerbated by health problems. As we get older, we run the risk of health problems and chronic conditions. I have to keep an eye on my blood pressure and cholesterol. Exercise and diet aren’t my favorite things in the world, but once I took a good hard look in the mirror, I recognized that I owed it to myself and my children to take better care of myself. Intermittent fasting and short walks with the dog have done wonders.
Do a little health audit. Are there histories of certain health problems in your family? What are you doing to prevent them?
If you have a chronic health condition, are you managing it well? What can you do to alleviate the symptoms or improve your well-being? Are you keeping up on your appointments?
Finances
Are you in a slump because your finances aren’t great? Maybe you have a lot of debt. Maybe you aren’t as wealthy as you expected to be at this point. Or maybe you have accumulated a lot of wealth, but you’re scared to take risks. Our finances can definitely leave us feeling stuck and anxious for a variety of reasons.
The good news is there are lots of things you can do to improve your financial situation, even in midlife. If you need to take a closer look at your finances, start tracking all of your spending. I really mean all of it. Figure out what is necessary and what is frivolous.
Empower is a free website I use to get a handle on my spending and see my overall net worth. It’s a really powerful tool.
